I thought I was so tired? Why am I awake at 2 in the morning? Is blogging really like writing in a journal ? Or is this more like a diary? Why do they call it blogging? I mentioned to Whit yesterday that I think I will stop coloring my hair because maybe the chemicals in the dye are not good for a cancer patient...funny how I have become a CANCER patient since a little after 2 yesterday. I don't feel any different physically except for the sore left breast from biopsy, yet now every little ache or twitch makes me wonder if it has spread. I hate how everything seems spookier when I am awake in the middle of the night. Today Summer, Dana, Autumn and Dominic come visit. Rach is going to be here as well. Better try to get some sleep so I'm not cranky. Gonna play with this blog thing. I see lots of little buttons that promise to be a little fun. Wonder if my grand babies will recognize me with white hair or NO hair. They all seem to know me with glasses so no more contact lenses for me. I so love being a grandma. My prayer was to live long enough to see them grown into young men and women.
Mark is snoring so loud that I can not understand why he doesn't wake himself up !
Mark on one side of me and the ticking of the clock in between snorts :)
Nice...music to my ears.
Think I will get up and get something to eat ( I hear chemo patients lose their appetite and so I should plump up a bit).
,
Aug.2012
Mark and I ready for Blades wedding
The first ring
Dec. 7 2011
the bell of Victory!
Reading the plaque
Patients ring this bell on their last treatment.
8 comments:
I think if anything you have found your calling! Great writing! Schultz used to tell us keep your eyes up and focus just a little bit ahead, not the end because the race would feel too long. Then from the sidelines a little mexican woman is yelling "Como Agrie" (is that the right spelling? Run like the wind Mama! Please leave some goodies in the fridge so we can graze together tonight:) L.U.B
We are all circling you with our prayers so you will be strong and when you stumble a little we will be there to hold you up. We will have a celebration of life with the family all there tonight. (I like cookies...by the way)
Julie, we are with you through the fight till there is complete victory. I have a couple of favors to ask of you.#1 DO NOT CALL IT 'MY CANCER'. DO NOT LET ANYONE CALL IT 'JULIE'S/MOM/SISTERS/ETC. CANCER. You don't want ownership of it. It is from and is the devil's. Let the damn fool keep it!
#2 God gave me a few things to speak over you and you should also speak them aloud many times. Here goes:
"Father, because of Your Word I am an overcomer. I overcome the world, the flesh, and the devil, by the Blood of the Lamb and the word of my testimony." (1John 4:4; Rev. 12:11)
"I am redeemed from the curse, Gal.3:13 is flowing in my blood stream. It flows to every cell of my body, restoring life and health." (Mark 11:23; Luke 17:6)
"That which God has not planted is dissolved and rooted out of my body in Jesus' name. 1 Peter 2:24 is engrafted into every fiber of my being and I am alive with the life of God." (Mark 11:23; John 6:63)
You are a tough, strong lady and you have that kind of family and friends standing with you. This doesn't have to be a long ordeal. Jesus already paid the price for you complete healing, and you know that.
We love you and are here holding your arms up in praise for your restoration. Glory to God
Julie, you have such a gift of writing! I cried reading your 2am posting...keep it up! I am in total agreement with Marty and I will speak these promises from our precious savior over you daily!
My arms are around you my friend.
Good words, Marty. I second them. Don't accept ownership of this. Picture yourself whole. With you hand on your breast, declare that you are whole and healthy, and that you do not accept ownership of this invader of your body. Keep a positive healthy attitude, while still validating your grief journey. You need to do both - they're not mutually exclusive. Love you so much.
So proud of you mom! Got a great laugh at the last part! With some of that Ganja, though, you are supposed to still have at least somewhat of an appetite. :) I will see you tomorrow. Love you. Love reading this.
Julie, just figured out how to post on this! A bit slow. I love the encouragement your friends and family post to you! I love reading your posts mostly...what a dear, long time friend you are to me...so blessed to call you friend...may our Lord give you courage, hope, and healing today and every day...thinking of you and Whitney today with prayers joining all the saints and angels.
My dear friend, when my brother went through chemo the doctor told him to have milkshakes made with the best, thickest and richest ice cream he could get. I helped him by making them. So indulge yourself!! Helped him keep some weight on, and helped me gain some!
Your blog is wonderful. Love you, Kitty
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