Wow what an afternoon! Yes I have cancer and yes I will be going through chemotherapy and then I will lose both of my mammary glands and after THAT I will have radiation and maybe more chemotherapy. My doctor was very chatty and he reminds me of someone I should know. Mark and Whitney were there in the room with me as Dr. Winslow gave me the rundown of what he had already suspected. Advanced lobular breast cancer, stage 3 and may be in the chest wall. "Oh and by the way- it is also in your skin" so aggressive treatment is the way to go. I think it was at this point that I asked (sheepishly) if I could smoke a little of the wacky tobacky (for medicinal purposes of course). His look was OMG! I think his face as well as his bald head turned red cuz he was speechless...HA! Then we realized that he thought I said that I smoked it NOW! We roared with gales of laughter and I realized that it felt good. Bible is right,laughter is good medicine. I don't know if that is really in the bible but it does say it is good for the soul.. . (I think). What a relief to have a face for my sparring partner for the next year or so. I cannot tell you how good I feel that I have a name for what has kept me awake for the last few days. I really am sort of a chicken I discovered. I even think that I made sure to mention that I do not want to experience any pain. Dr.W said I will not have pain just feel tired and maybe a little nauseous. Dang it anyway! I forgot to say "and no nausea AND I want a little hit of speed to keep the lethargy away".
He just happened to throw in that I would be losing my head of thick hair. Thank goodness I had my eyeliner tattooed on a couple of years ago so I won't look like I have chicken eyes with no eyelashes. OMGosh what about my eyebrows!? Silly old woman...
Many prayer warriors were interceding for me and I can guarantee that my hair and eyebrows were never mentioned. Thank you all because I really felt like I was not alone.
Cancer, we come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty. I am not afraid. Thank you God for all of my friends and family that are with me on this journey. Help me to honor you by NOT being a baby. Amen and Amen. I think tonight I will sleep like one though. I AM POOPED :)
Aug.2012
Mark and I ready for Blades wedding
The first ring
Dec. 7 2011
the bell of Victory!
Reading the plaque
Patients ring this bell on their last treatment.
4 comments:
Amen mama! We are all right by your side. <3
Hi Julie, please know that we have alot of amazing prayer warriors that have been and will continue to be praying for you! You are the strongest most awesome lady I know, but more importantly is the fact that you are a daughter of the King of Kings! As much as I could express how much I love you, I can't even touch the love our Lord Jesus has for you! I'm here for you in any way you may need.
Well damn :-( I wrote a really great comment this morning & it never showed up. I am going to try to re-do it, but I'm sure that I was much funnier with the caffeine buzzing through me but for you Ju I'd do anything!
First off I LOVE LOVE LOVE reading this--I miss just hanging with you & laughing--Lord knows we laugh A LOT and reading this is just like having an actual conversation with you (just like always it's hard to get a word in LOL just kidding). You are truly talented at writing & I hope this writing/journaling/blogging whatever will help you deal with the emotions that you like to keep locked up Tough Woman.
I wish there was some magic button I could push to make all of this go away & make you cancer free--who'm I kidding? a button to eradicate cancer completely--but since I can't I just want you to know that I am here for you & if there is anything you need or I can do for you all you have to do is ask---I know that's hard sometimes, asking for help, but like Nana Kay told me a long time ago-don't let your pride rob someone else of the blessing of helping you (I still hear her voice in my ear when I get prideful dang it lol). Yell, cuss, cry when you need to, it's ok to be angry (you know God can handle your anger as well as your praise) do what you need to do and just keep moving forward. "Don't stop and take a picture" just keep moving and if need be all of us surrounding you will carry you forward--that's what friends do, even in the ugly times. ooohhh speaking of that, you know you are beautiful inside & out but losing your hair may be a great way to try a bunch of different wigs--instead of rearranging the furniture every week, you could just try different wigs :-D also, if you do lose your eyebrows, Whit got pretty good at drawing hers on after she shaved them so she could probably hook you up there. I love you Julie & I know that you will beat this thing! I am already believing in the complete healing. cancer has no clue what a strong, FAITHFUL woman it is messing with; a woman surrounded by great prayer warriors & held tight by The Great Healer. Keep writing, keep smiling and keep fighting!! <3 V
I loved reading Vetters comments...a gift for you today!
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