Yesterday was a gorgeous day! I was so excited to get out there and dig in the dirt and play with my dogs (or at least watch them run and jump). The excitement that I showed must have taken a lot of my energy because I was pretty much worthless. I got tired very quickly. I guess I thought that just because I am not having chemo pumped into my body, that I am back to normal in a week or so...where have I been ? I said to Mark yesterday that I have had more headaches and flippy stomach in the last 3 days than I have had the whole time I have been getting chemo. I have no idea why I am waking up with these headaches. Except wait....do not have one this morning...thank you Lord!
The sun was way too hot for me even with my big old 'field worker' hat on and the shade made the back of my bald head hurt from the cold. I was pretty much trying to find my ' pace' most of the morning. By the time I got up from my nap, I discovered that I have to be a 'shade follower' for a while. No more direct sun for this old gal.
Julianna asked if she could help me 'weed' my flower beds (so much grass) and of course I said yes...my baby's breath is a little bit thinner now because if there are no flowers, they must be weeds ;) Her attention span is about as long as her LaLa's so she was off playing in the mud with her new gloves on...she called it finger painting...smearing mud on a piece of wood. By the time she went in the house she looked like she had really worked hard!!! HA!
Ryan worked hard cleaning under the deck and it looks great under there! Thanks Ry. I have a very difficult time having others do stuff for me... I weave a mean guilt quilt. I started beating myself up because I got tired so easily. I like to work along side people and it was too much for me....notice that? I , I , I , I....slipped into the 'all about me' cry. Waaa waaa!
I remember that just a few months ago when I got the 'diagnosis', I was so grateful to be alive and that I was at total peace with ALL because TODAY was all I was given and the future was only for the Lord to know...how quickly we humans (me) forget and slip back into self crap. Forgive me Father.
My yard work got started, my gonna be patio (under deck) got cleaned up, the sun is shining, AND some friends from Billings (George and Mel) sent a gorgeous bouquet of flowers just because!!!!
Ps. 118 :24 This is the day which the Lord hath made, I will rejoice and be glad in it.
Aug.2012
Mark and I ready for Blades wedding
The first ring
Dec. 7 2011
the bell of Victory!
Reading the plaque
Patients ring this bell on their last treatment.
6 comments:
Thinking of you digging with your dogs and little Julianna is a great picture! Being tired and not keeping the pace is alien to you, but you sure have the desire and that's awesome! Glad you got flowers to have inside too...fun gift. Enjoy the shade and may you have courage, hope, and healing. love, Patti
Well, Julianna must take after me, remember I kept asking you with a bunch of weeds/flowers already in my hands - "are these flowers or weeds". Most of the time they were flowers! Yikes, a pissed off sista!! Oh well
Well Superwoman, now you know what it's like to not be able to be everything for everyone at one time. Not much fun, huh. Personally, I think you had a bit of ADHD, but that was because I was so "laid back," a very "groovy" word for lazy. But then again, it could have have been the weed. Ah, the 70's, when everything was so simple! But seriously, give yourself a break. This is a good time to reflect on how lucky you are to have people who love you unconditionally and are there for you and expect nothing in return. I realize that now, with you and Rachel being in the top 99%. I always love spring because it means a new beginning, and this year there is a mourning dove nesting right outside my window in the flowering crab apple tree. She has been in the tree hanging on for dear life through all the wind and rain we've had, such a tenacity for life! Keep up the positive energy and I promise I will try to do the same. Still Loving and Praying for you - Chavela
Life has a funny way of keeping track of people who are important to each of us. Julie you and Mark have always held such a special place in our hearts, even though we haven't had the pleasure of sharing the last several years in each other's company. Then beautiful Summer, who was not so long ago a little girl, came back into our lives through Face Book. We still hold you close to our hearts and pray for your recovery. Kathy and Mike
Hi Julie and Mark, THINK OF YOU BOTH SO OFTEN. JULIE YOU ARE SUCH AN INSPIRATION TO ME AND SO MANY. AFTER FOLLOWING YOUR BLOG I HAVE STARTED TO REALIZE THAT I DON'T HAVE WORRY ABOUT PLEASING ANYONE EXCEPT JESUS AND MYSELF. KEEP UP THE FIGHT CAUSE YOU ARE GOING TO WIN. I WONDER HOW YOU ARE DOING, NO ONE LETS ME KNOW SO I AM ASKING YOU DIRECT. GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU AND YOUR LOVED ONES. JESUS HUGS. BONNIE
Hi Prima I have been taking care of mom this past week and I have not been close to computer so I am late on commenting. I am glad to see you are enjoying the nice weather even if it does drain your energy. The sun is not kind to bald heads like my dad and your dad and us who inherited their type of hair and even my ears get burned because I have so little hair. Mom wakes up and comes out of her bedroom with her hat on because her hair is messy and makes us laugh. I will post a picture of that so you can see it. We love you and are praying for you. -Fina
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